Over the past couple of weeks, I was rummaging through literally hundreds of files from the old Mentalhope project, and I came across a page from someone that become dear to me. Her name is Asanah. She was working on a website and was in recovery, but when she shared her story to be published on the Mentalhope website, it was riveting. On her website that is now defunct, it told even more of an amazing story that truly demonstrated what recovery was. At one point, I had published some of her artwork, but she ask me to take it down because it was such a very graphic portrayal of her recent years, and she didn’t want to be a trigger for someone else. The last time I had contact was about 4 years ago over the phone, and she had several projects going. It made me smile a little more that day.
This is her story as published by Mentalhope.com in 2006:
Asanah’s Story:
It’s not only the mom with post-partum depression, the chronic drug user, someone with a history of psychological problems or the homeless guy on the streets who experiences a mental illness. There might be more of us who don’t necessarily fit the profile for mental illness who now have a story to tell. I was 30 single and active in life when I had first experienced a mental breakdown. Nowadays most people definitely realize that life can be a juggling act. Things included are relationships, work, school, and home. Sometimes it can be the inability to digest hurtful or disappointing events that life will throw you ie. loss of a job, crimes of the heart or health issues. These can destroy a person’s everything. Burning the candle at both ends for a prolonged period of time can sometimes be a recipe for disaster. After a 3-week hospitalization in May 2005, I began to stabilize. This allowed me to finish my thesis, graduate with my Master’s, work full time and live med free. There is no formula for recovery but hopefully we can gain some insight and perspective on an issue that is becoming more common. My goal was to reach out and encourage others so
psychotic minds came about.
Stress and depression definitely played a role. My mind was filled with hallucinations and delusions that seemed completely unrelated. They left me disorganized in speech and thought. It would take time trying to articulate the events and experiences surrounding my breakdown. The large
collage shows what it is like to experience non drug related psychosis(removed at Asanah’s request). It details the themes and images that stuck in my mind. I believed that everyone’s story was playing somewhere in the world…whether in the news, in the movies or on stage. I had clearly located my story in the image to the left. It was the catatonic behavior that caused me to land in the psyche ward. Shortly after my hospitalization, I began to rehabilitate myself by taking some drawing classes and with the help of a graphic artist I was able to bring my portraits to life. I’ve managed to make a few lifestyle changes and have been healing every since.
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Asanah, if you find this post, comment and I will send you my email. I want you to know that I still think of you, and your work in the community. Agape love and positive thoughts to you dear friend, and may your path be pleasant.
Keep it Real, Keep it True
Rod
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